HOW DO I ALWAYS FIND MYSELF IN THESE POSITIONS?????:
One of the neighborhood kids came to my door to let me know that another child, Ben had thrown a rather large piece of wood at Gabe and hit him in the face. Gabe was fine, but although I usually simply tell Gabe to work things out on his own, since this was a physical thing I decided I needed to go talk to the mom (whom I seem to always get in fights with over little things like, music and domestic abuse....) Anyhoo...I take this stick, taller than me, up to her house and I say, "Is this yours?"
"No"
"Well, Benjamin was hitting Gabe with it. I think he got it from this pile of rubble by our house. I thought you would want to know."
"Well, Ben said that Gabe was hitting him." (natch)
"Well, I don't know about that, but I do know that all these kids" (I point to the three or four who had followed me up there) "saw him do it."
"Ok. BEN!"
So that discussion ends and I walk back to my house. On the way I talk to a couple of neighbors one of whom is a Marine. While we're talking when this girls HUSBAND interrupts my conversation and says, "What do you need?"
"Excuse me?" I say
"You came to my house, what did you need?"
"I told your wife that Ben was hitting Gabe with this rather large stick"
"Boys are going to be boys Monique."
(I'm mad.)
I say, "Well, that may be true but when your son is hitting my son with this, you're gonna hear about it."
"Gabe does the same thing up here."
"And you're welcome to come and tell me about it."
"I'm just saying that boys are going to do these things."
"It sounds like your making an excuse for him," I say.
"I'm not making an excuse for him. I just came down to thank you (he says this with as much sarcasm as his one cell brain can muster) for informing me but boys are going to be boys" (again.)
Then it's just going back and forth until he tells me to CALM DOWN, gets the Marine involved, (who walks away in the middle of the conversation) and then he walks away from me.
You know what that was? That was pure intimidation. What a F****** asshole, right? He knows Terry is gone. He didn't come to "thank me" and when Terry gets back, that guy is going to get a visit. Bastard.
End email.
Seriously though, after this, several other scuffles with the same people and the blow up on the guy in the parking lot, I'm beginning to wonder if it's me with the problem. Or could it be that I'm dealing with really incompetent, immature people? And then what? I stoop to there level and spoon feed them the conversation? Or I use my wit, sarcasm and manipulation to embarras them and drive the point home that I really AM a b**** so don't mess with me? If I do that, then I run the risk of a battle of wits with a person armed with nothing but an actual gun. (He was getting a little mad and stepping towards me during that conversation as well. But I DID have the six foot long piece of wood in my hand and I wasn't afraid to use it :)It's always a fine line to walk, whether or not to "tell" a parent what their bratty little kid is doing, and normally I don't say anything. I tell Gabe to handle it, but when they're doing things like this, physically hurting each other, I feel compelled to say something. Not to mention this confrontation is coming from the father, whose wife calls me to complain when I don't invite her kid to the playground. She continually tells me how pissed off she gets when people are "messing with her kids." Apparently her husband chalks it all up to gender. "Oh, he beat your kid with a piece of wood? Boys will be boys..." I suppose he is living in the place where a penis and a good church can excuse you from anything. Ok that was little low.
And they're the kind of parents who think their child never does anything wrong, who will always doubt YOU and YOUR kid without even considering that their kid could be just oh, I don't know, a friggin' brat? I've had people tell me about acts my son has committed and I talk to him, if it's true he is disciplined, but I never fight with the other parent or make excuses (at least not in front of them) Incidentally Gabriel is freakishly honest about his crimes. He's confessed to things I would have never found out about, although Terry has him convinced that we see everything...
Ok I have to put my flawless, angelic children to bed. I'm going to hit the hay early so I can dream about pummelling this guy for being the biggest loser, confronting a single woman with a child in her arms KNOWING her husband is not there to fight her battles as he does for his wife. Bastard.
3 comments:
Just so you know, its not you.. people are going to be jerks and never want to take responsibility for their kids, they would rather pass the buck and blame somebody else. If their kid was hitting your kid.. then their kid was wrong and those loser parents should take responsibility.
BTW, thanks for checking out my blog, I appreciate the comment on the description too... very cool of you. I also should tell you I like your blog as well
Sweetie, I don't think it's you in this case. I think there is something really wrong with this family and probably it's time to find Gabe some new friends. xo, me
You did nothing wrong, and the way you described it, everything right. Trying to intimidate a woman with her child in her arms? As a man, I'm ashamed another "man" would do such a thing, but not entirely surprised. Let your husband deal with him when he returns, but I suspect the wimp will be singing a different tune by then. As for the Marine who walked away so as not to get involved, I would say to him please take off your uniform and let a real man wear it with pride. Normally, I would suspect he was an officer, but that actually would be unfair to even most officers!
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