Gabe (10) - No.
Asher - But when you kiss them you can get sick.
Gabe - [Confused] I know. [Eager] But I’ve never kissed a girl.
Asher -Yes you have. You kissed mommy.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
I'm back. Sorta
I've been away from blogger so long that I typed my address in wrong and got a page not found message. My heart stopped. Everything about the deployment, gone forever. Then I realized I forgot a 'w'. Whew. Crisis averted.
Why have I dropped off the face of the earth? Life, lack of inspiration and motherhood. No, I am not one of the legions of women who are knocked up these days and are now dropping from the outside world to blog about their babies. Seriously, it's an epidemic. I've never seen so much about a child documented for posterity.
Although sometimes I wouldn't mind another little one of us to coo at once in a while. Having a 10 and 4 year old makes you rethink the baby stages. I used to think it miserable to be on a leash the length of your boob. Now I say, at least there are books for that. What to expect when you're expecting? Pregnancy and the first six weeks of life are explained in perfect order. All nine months typed into neat little lists of will happen. Month one. Congratulations! You are pregnant with a seahorse. Take folic acid and try not to throw up, get hemmoroids, or pimples. If those things don't happen to you, lie. No one likes a freak.
How about a book for raising 10 year old boys? It could be called: "You're too late. They already know." Inside would be facial expressions you will encounter when you broach subjects of sex, girls and puberty. Pick one and practice your reaction in the mirror. Let Nothing Shock You. You are understanding and patient. You are not afraid to say penis and vagina or hear it from your child, who was once a really cute baby who didn't even have a cone head when he was born. There are no books for the preschooler who sings, "bow chica wow wow" with a perfect electric guitar wawa sound.
I've been away because suddenly the mommy job, as you can tell is more important and complicated than ever, and I expect it to become more so as they get older and we navigate dating and explaining to Asher why a seven year old cannot go on a date with his brother and his girlfriend.
Gabe is in 5th grade. Asher is in preschool and will go to kindergarten next year. I'm freelancing from home, which has its obvious delights like not having to actually produce anything, since you ARE your own boss, but sometimes it does get a little lonely. I keep wondering what I'll do when both the boys are in school full time. I really can't even imagine having 6 uninterrupted hours a day. Of course the plan is to pull a Pelosi/Palin and be the next soccer mom to rule the world. Will we be over soccer moms by then? Will Oprah spawn children with Ricky Martin's sperm and ruin the achievements of super moms everywhere? Actually, I think it will be even more lonely knowing that my children are growing up and they will never be home with me again. They will always have their own "job" at school now. Makes you wish for baby days again. But with slightly bigger boobs.
So, here are my munchkins. I love them so much. They are really funny when you get them liquored up. Just kidding. It actually only creates more work for me because they just trash the place and then I have to clean it up.
Now, please take a real picture for mommy?
Aaaand we're back to posing...
Why have I dropped off the face of the earth? Life, lack of inspiration and motherhood. No, I am not one of the legions of women who are knocked up these days and are now dropping from the outside world to blog about their babies. Seriously, it's an epidemic. I've never seen so much about a child documented for posterity.
Although sometimes I wouldn't mind another little one of us to coo at once in a while. Having a 10 and 4 year old makes you rethink the baby stages. I used to think it miserable to be on a leash the length of your boob. Now I say, at least there are books for that. What to expect when you're expecting? Pregnancy and the first six weeks of life are explained in perfect order. All nine months typed into neat little lists of will happen. Month one. Congratulations! You are pregnant with a seahorse. Take folic acid and try not to throw up, get hemmoroids, or pimples. If those things don't happen to you, lie. No one likes a freak.
How about a book for raising 10 year old boys? It could be called: "You're too late. They already know." Inside would be facial expressions you will encounter when you broach subjects of sex, girls and puberty. Pick one and practice your reaction in the mirror. Let Nothing Shock You. You are understanding and patient. You are not afraid to say penis and vagina or hear it from your child, who was once a really cute baby who didn't even have a cone head when he was born. There are no books for the preschooler who sings, "bow chica wow wow" with a perfect electric guitar wawa sound.
I've been away because suddenly the mommy job, as you can tell is more important and complicated than ever, and I expect it to become more so as they get older and we navigate dating and explaining to Asher why a seven year old cannot go on a date with his brother and his girlfriend.
Gabe is in 5th grade. Asher is in preschool and will go to kindergarten next year. I'm freelancing from home, which has its obvious delights like not having to actually produce anything, since you ARE your own boss, but sometimes it does get a little lonely. I keep wondering what I'll do when both the boys are in school full time. I really can't even imagine having 6 uninterrupted hours a day. Of course the plan is to pull a Pelosi/Palin and be the next soccer mom to rule the world. Will we be over soccer moms by then? Will Oprah spawn children with Ricky Martin's sperm and ruin the achievements of super moms everywhere? Actually, I think it will be even more lonely knowing that my children are growing up and they will never be home with me again. They will always have their own "job" at school now. Makes you wish for baby days again. But with slightly bigger boobs.
So, here are my munchkins. I love them so much. They are really funny when you get them liquored up. Just kidding. It actually only creates more work for me because they just trash the place and then I have to clean it up.
Now, please take a real picture for mommy?
Aaaand we're back to posing...
Monday, May 26, 2008
Congrats to Jess Riley!!
Jess Riley's book Driving Sideways is finally published! She is on my blogroll and is one of the best writers in blogdom. Check out her blog and maybe even pick up her book for summer read!! http://jessriley.blogspot.com/
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
The magic of Disney
I wasn't surprised when I read this story about a couple who lost their wedding rings at Disney World and Disney staff found them and returned the rings.
When we went for a weeklong vaca in November - and had a thoroughly magical time celebrating Asher's birthday and Thanksgiving - my husband lost our camera. On the last day of our trip. With over 700 photos on it, including Asher's birthday at the Crystal Palace. We both wanted to cry. Well, after spending a restless last night in our resort room we called lost and found and it was there! Obviously we were relieved but we had to catch our flight so we couldn't go and get it. They agreed to send it to us.
Then, as we boarded our Magical Express bus to the airport we realized we forgot Asher's special Mickey in the hotel room. Argh! So, we called lost and found again. They checked the hotel room and it was indeed there. Three days later a box arrived on our doorstep with one special edition Mickey doll and a lifetime of memories inside.
That's why we love Disney.
When we went for a weeklong vaca in November - and had a thoroughly magical time celebrating Asher's birthday and Thanksgiving - my husband lost our camera. On the last day of our trip. With over 700 photos on it, including Asher's birthday at the Crystal Palace. We both wanted to cry. Well, after spending a restless last night in our resort room we called lost and found and it was there! Obviously we were relieved but we had to catch our flight so we couldn't go and get it. They agreed to send it to us.
Then, as we boarded our Magical Express bus to the airport we realized we forgot Asher's special Mickey in the hotel room. Argh! So, we called lost and found again. They checked the hotel room and it was indeed there. Three days later a box arrived on our doorstep with one special edition Mickey doll and a lifetime of memories inside.
That's why we love Disney.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Finally, a family can rest
Sgt. Matthew Maupin's parents can finally rest, though I know it was not the end they were hoping for. I hope though, it brings some closure instead of wondering every night what happened to their son.
The longer this war lasts, the more I wonder how many more of our greatest will be lost; and how long America will not fully grasp the price that such a small percentage of our population has paid. 4,000+ dead; over 30,000 wounded. Support your troops and their families, America!!
The longer this war lasts, the more I wonder how many more of our greatest will be lost; and how long America will not fully grasp the price that such a small percentage of our population has paid. 4,000+ dead; over 30,000 wounded. Support your troops and their families, America!!
Monday, March 24, 2008
A grim milestone
It's so, so terrible to know that 4,000 of our bravest have died. I think we are losing the best of our generation there.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Marines in Berkeley
Nicole posted this video on her blog: Marines in Berkeley and while it was hilarious, I was left kind of angry too. I detest these people who have no concept of what our military does or why we need them:
"I don't know a good use of the Marines in my lifetime" says one peace activist.
"I felt like how the Iraqis probably felt, like we were being occupied," another liberal laments about the new recruiting office. (I'm banging my head on the table at this point.)
My favorite part was when the "journalist" (It's the Daily Show) says to one of the Code Pink activists going on about how they had a right to protest in front of the recruiting center; "If only there were an organization sworn to protect free speech”? And she laughed, "That would be nice." Idiot.
"I don't know a good use of the Marines in my lifetime" says one peace activist.
"I felt like how the Iraqis probably felt, like we were being occupied," another liberal laments about the new recruiting office. (I'm banging my head on the table at this point.)
My favorite part was when the "journalist" (It's the Daily Show) says to one of the Code Pink activists going on about how they had a right to protest in front of the recruiting center; "If only there were an organization sworn to protect free speech”? And she laughed, "That would be nice." Idiot.
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Reserve lesson number 42
It was obvious I didn’t spend much time on post when I exited the commissary doors into the bittersweet sound of TAPS. And kept walking. The young bagger stopped. I looked at him quizzically and then slowly started to move on. He leaned into pushing the cart while he, rightfully, asked, “Um we’re not going to stop?” I spun around, “Stop? We’re supposed to stop?” I knew I had done something wrong and the big letter “R” for “reserve spouse” was burning brightly on my back. “Yeah,” the boy said. “Well, some people don’t…” he trailed off.
I’m going to say he was trying to make me feel better about my faux pas.
“No!” I said, eager to be part of the ritual. “I want to. Let’s stop.” So we stopped and listened as the last note faded into the wind.
While we loaded the grocery bags into the trunk he explained that it’s played each evening. “I had no idea,” I said, still embarrassed, mentally lecturing my husband, part time soldier for more than 10 years at the time, and wondering how I had missed this in all the years since I discovered the commissary had cereal for half the price of my local Safeway. I paid the bagger for his help and his lesson and went on my way.
Several years later I’m sitting outside the Home and Garden store on another post, in another part of the country, when I hear the faint sound of that familiar trumpet tune. I feel confident. I know what to do. But then I freeze.
Do I get out? Or stay in the car?
I’m going to say he was trying to make me feel better about my faux pas.
“No!” I said, eager to be part of the ritual. “I want to. Let’s stop.” So we stopped and listened as the last note faded into the wind.
While we loaded the grocery bags into the trunk he explained that it’s played each evening. “I had no idea,” I said, still embarrassed, mentally lecturing my husband, part time soldier for more than 10 years at the time, and wondering how I had missed this in all the years since I discovered the commissary had cereal for half the price of my local Safeway. I paid the bagger for his help and his lesson and went on my way.
Several years later I’m sitting outside the Home and Garden store on another post, in another part of the country, when I hear the faint sound of that familiar trumpet tune. I feel confident. I know what to do. But then I freeze.
Do I get out? Or stay in the car?
Saturday, December 29, 2007
HoodWiinked
I can keep a secret about as well as Google, so when my colleague told me, gently, so I would not scream, that her husband had brokered a Wii for my husband son at the retail store where he works, I spent the last five days before Christmas shoving food into my mouth to stop the word "Wii" from squeaking out.
This year, I alone would hold the title of Coolest Parent. Terry wouldn't even know what hit him.
On the celebration of the day of our Lord's birth, I brushed off the last flecks of glitter still clinging to my four-year-old "Mommy's little deer" sweatshirt that Gabe made me wear each year, adjusted the heap of mass on my head to rearrange the greasy spots, and slid the rectangular shape in front of my husband.
"The last one's for daddy," I singsonged, then honked, "Not!" and pushed it in front of Gabe. They both looked at me confused. "Open it!" I squealed, then clamped my mouth with my hands.
Gabe lifted one flap of one side of wrapping paper and calmly declared: "It's a Wii," as if a long awaited male heir to a throne had been confirmed.
Not the shredding of paper and tackle of affection and laughter I had envisioned.
Then Terry, eyes protuberant, mouth agape, "What!? How did you get that?!"
The dam burst: "Hannah's husband got one when they had a drawing at his work for the employees to buy a Wii 'cause they never get to stand in line to buy one 'cause they're always working when the store opens and they can't wait in line when they're working but the guy who won the Wii didn't want it and since Hannah already had one and they knew we couldn't find one her husband asked the guy for the ticket to buy the Wii and he bought it for us and you have no idea how many times I wanted to tell you but I wanted it to be a surprise are you surprised?"
I'm pretty sure my husband was picturing me naked. "You cook breakfast, I'm going to set up the Wii," he said hotly.
I blinked. Twice. Three times.
I am writing Nintendo immediately. Be dammed lead painted toys, this Wii contraption is dangerous for women. And addicting.
This year, I alone would hold the title of Coolest Parent. Terry wouldn't even know what hit him.
On the celebration of the day of our Lord's birth, I brushed off the last flecks of glitter still clinging to my four-year-old "Mommy's little deer" sweatshirt that Gabe made me wear each year, adjusted the heap of mass on my head to rearrange the greasy spots, and slid the rectangular shape in front of my husband.
"The last one's for daddy," I singsonged, then honked, "Not!" and pushed it in front of Gabe. They both looked at me confused. "Open it!" I squealed, then clamped my mouth with my hands.
Gabe lifted one flap of one side of wrapping paper and calmly declared: "It's a Wii," as if a long awaited male heir to a throne had been confirmed.
Not the shredding of paper and tackle of affection and laughter I had envisioned.
Then Terry, eyes protuberant, mouth agape, "What!? How did you get that?!"
The dam burst: "Hannah's husband got one when they had a drawing at his work for the employees to buy a Wii 'cause they never get to stand in line to buy one 'cause they're always working when the store opens and they can't wait in line when they're working but the guy who won the Wii didn't want it and since Hannah already had one and they knew we couldn't find one her husband asked the guy for the ticket to buy the Wii and he bought it for us and you have no idea how many times I wanted to tell you but I wanted it to be a surprise are you surprised?"
I'm pretty sure my husband was picturing me naked. "You cook breakfast, I'm going to set up the Wii," he said hotly.
I blinked. Twice. Three times.
I am writing Nintendo immediately. Be dammed lead painted toys, this Wii contraption is dangerous for women. And addicting.
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Me First
It's the time of year when everyone counts down everything. Best books of 2007, best gadgets of 2007, and of course there will be the ego fest we all know as the Oscars to rate the best movies of 2007. (Or more accurately, the smallest budgeted movies released in the fewest theaters in the United States on Christmas whose scripts called for long silences and beautiful women made to look ugly.) US News even released its first high school rankings to go along with the rest of the world's annual display of OCD.
I admit I read them, just to see if I'm totally out of the loop. I don't ever actually act on these lists (except for the high school ranking, that I'm taking pretty seriously). But really, what's the point of these things besides the fun picking who or what makes the cut and free advertising for the makers? Am I supposed to be swayed by 10 or 12 executives who probably live in Manhattan and have little more to do with raising children and cleaning toilets than I do buying $70,000 cars?
And don't even get me started on things as subjective as books and movies. Of all the drivel and brilliance created in our world, how can you whittle it down to 10 or 20 fixed spots? How do you compare engrossing Harry Potter with warm and fuzzy classic Goodnight Moon? It's like asking me to choose rank my left foot over my right. I need them both!!!
The best new book of 07 in our house? Take Care, Good Knight by Shelley Moore Thomas. It's just the right silly for 3-4 year olds, and even Gabe was drawn in by my and Asher's giggles to finish the story with us. It's about what happens with three friendly, little dragons agree to babysit a wizard's cats but can't read his instructions. Cats being stuffed in cupboards and forced to go swimming. Hilarious!!
But I guess we count on those lists, if for nothing else than to remind us that the year is done, I didn't use, read, or watch anything popular and that I really need to get the job ranking the best hotels in the world.
I admit I read them, just to see if I'm totally out of the loop. I don't ever actually act on these lists (except for the high school ranking, that I'm taking pretty seriously). But really, what's the point of these things besides the fun picking who or what makes the cut and free advertising for the makers? Am I supposed to be swayed by 10 or 12 executives who probably live in Manhattan and have little more to do with raising children and cleaning toilets than I do buying $70,000 cars?
And don't even get me started on things as subjective as books and movies. Of all the drivel and brilliance created in our world, how can you whittle it down to 10 or 20 fixed spots? How do you compare engrossing Harry Potter with warm and fuzzy classic Goodnight Moon? It's like asking me to choose rank my left foot over my right. I need them both!!!
The best new book of 07 in our house? Take Care, Good Knight by Shelley Moore Thomas. It's just the right silly for 3-4 year olds, and even Gabe was drawn in by my and Asher's giggles to finish the story with us. It's about what happens with three friendly, little dragons agree to babysit a wizard's cats but can't read his instructions. Cats being stuffed in cupboards and forced to go swimming. Hilarious!!
But I guess we count on those lists, if for nothing else than to remind us that the year is done, I didn't use, read, or watch anything popular and that I really need to get the job ranking the best hotels in the world.
Monday, December 03, 2007
Disneywhirl
Holy cow! If this blog was my baby I'd be Britney Spears ya'll.
What have I been up to? Writing, working, traveling. That pretty much sums it up. I've been to Vegas, Seattle and Orlando (Disneyworld!!) the past three months and that's the most flying I've done in over two years. I loathe flying cross country because I was across the country from my husband and Gabe when 9/11 happened and I hate the thought of being five hours and at least two planes away from my family. But Orlando was a piece of cake.
We took the boys on a long overdue vacation to Disneyworld for six days, one that we had promised since daddy was deployed. It was totally worth the wait. Asher turned four and though Gabe had outgrown Fantasyland and all of the characters (except Donald Duck. He digs Donald) he relished in riding every roller coaster twice since Terry and I had to switch off watching Asher. We even worked out a system so we could hold two FastPasses at the same time by using Asher's ticket. (For those of you who have been so deprived as to never have experienced the magic of Disneyworld, FastPasses allow you to return to a popular ride at an assigned time and only wait for a few minutes, rather than standing in line for an hour debating whether Yoda or Vader is the most powerful Jedi in the universe.Oh, and you can only have one at time.)
Of all the fun, fantasy and food, watching Asher meet Tigger, Pooh and Eeyore right before the park closed and all the Christmas lights were lit, leaving him with extra personal time, was the most memorable. He clutched his hands to his chest like he was meeting Santa Claus himself, and could not stop giggling and grinning and jumping up and down in sheer delight. I only wish I had it on video, but here is a picture (Daddy and Gabe were off riding rides without us...)
...and of the rest of the trip, I will only subject you to these, a mere fraction of the 700+ snapshots I actually took.
Asher's Character dinner birthday with Winnie the Pooh and Friends
This is a shot of the water in "It's a small world," (during which Gabe continually shouted over the song in frustration, "What do they mean it's a small world??") See all that bling? That's coinage ... from the dummies who didn't account for all the thousands of dollars they had already poured into Disney's coffers. Ah well. They're true believers. I, on the other hand, was sure I spotted a silver dollar and thought for a good minute about scooping it up.
Ta-Ta For Now kiddies!
What have I been up to? Writing, working, traveling. That pretty much sums it up. I've been to Vegas, Seattle and Orlando (Disneyworld!!) the past three months and that's the most flying I've done in over two years. I loathe flying cross country because I was across the country from my husband and Gabe when 9/11 happened and I hate the thought of being five hours and at least two planes away from my family. But Orlando was a piece of cake.
We took the boys on a long overdue vacation to Disneyworld for six days, one that we had promised since daddy was deployed. It was totally worth the wait. Asher turned four and though Gabe had outgrown Fantasyland and all of the characters (except Donald Duck. He digs Donald) he relished in riding every roller coaster twice since Terry and I had to switch off watching Asher. We even worked out a system so we could hold two FastPasses at the same time by using Asher's ticket. (For those of you who have been so deprived as to never have experienced the magic of Disneyworld, FastPasses allow you to return to a popular ride at an assigned time and only wait for a few minutes, rather than standing in line for an hour debating whether Yoda or Vader is the most powerful Jedi in the universe.Oh, and you can only have one at time.)
Of all the fun, fantasy and food, watching Asher meet Tigger, Pooh and Eeyore right before the park closed and all the Christmas lights were lit, leaving him with extra personal time, was the most memorable. He clutched his hands to his chest like he was meeting Santa Claus himself, and could not stop giggling and grinning and jumping up and down in sheer delight. I only wish I had it on video, but here is a picture (Daddy and Gabe were off riding rides without us...)
...and of the rest of the trip, I will only subject you to these, a mere fraction of the 700+ snapshots I actually took.
Asher's Character dinner birthday with Winnie the Pooh and Friends
This is a shot of the water in "It's a small world," (during which Gabe continually shouted over the song in frustration, "What do they mean it's a small world??") See all that bling? That's coinage ... from the dummies who didn't account for all the thousands of dollars they had already poured into Disney's coffers. Ah well. They're true believers. I, on the other hand, was sure I spotted a silver dollar and thought for a good minute about scooping it up.
Ta-Ta For Now kiddies!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Booze, views, and writing news
The strangest thing happened. I went to Vegas to turn 29 and a half, and I can't remember a thing. (Except that my party of eight and I got into Pure nightclub as VIPs :)
With feeling: Chooooooocccaaaalllllatte
Well, I decided not to write the book. At least not now or for that outlet and it's a good thing because last week I got another writing job with another military market magazine. I'm excited and occasionally want to throw up from fear I cannot write for two magazines and work 26 hours a week and not leave my children manging for crumbs in the kitchen. I'm plotting my long term strategy right now.
In other news, our deck is finished. Yeaaah!!!! And Terry only ended up falling on a table saw, crushing his leg, and hammering his thumb. Totally worth it. Our holiday open house is December 8, so if you want to come, send me an email ;)
My pretty little kitchen that I can now abandon since Terry promised he would grill everyday if I let him build his deck. Ain't love grand?
With feeling: Chooooooocccaaaalllllatte
Well, I decided not to write the book. At least not now or for that outlet and it's a good thing because last week I got another writing job with another military market magazine. I'm excited and occasionally want to throw up from fear I cannot write for two magazines and work 26 hours a week and not leave my children manging for crumbs in the kitchen. I'm plotting my long term strategy right now.
In other news, our deck is finished. Yeaaah!!!! And Terry only ended up falling on a table saw, crushing his leg, and hammering his thumb. Totally worth it. Our holiday open house is December 8, so if you want to come, send me an email ;)
My pretty little kitchen that I can now abandon since Terry promised he would grill everyday if I let him build his deck. Ain't love grand?
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Book review - Home Fires Burning
Home Fires Burning by Karen Houppert is not your usual military spouse rah rah rah book. It's sold as a book about the military family. The author is an Air Force brat who lost her father to a flying accident while he was on duty, but she is not a military spouse. I want to say she is objective only because it's NOT like some of the god awful books by other mil spouses that I've read about military life, but every once in a while I think she leans a little left and it takes away from her arguments. For example she lauds the military health care system when describing the many benefits military familes receive and uses it as a rebuttal to conservatives who bemoan the the potential dangers of socialized medicine. "Even as conservative insist that a system of socialized medicine would mean inferior care for all, and that we would have to ration resources, the military mini-state has gone about quietly developing just such a system to serve its 1.3 million active-duty soldiers and their 2 million family members. " I have two words in response: Walter Reed. It highlighted a lot of problems that I think are seen throughout the military health care system. Don't you wait forever to get appointments? Have to drive long distances because there are no MTFs nearby, or all of the physicians are busy taking care of soldiers? When Terry was deployed I was fortunate to continue seeing my civilian provider because his civ employer (federal gov't) paid for one year of premiums while he was on active duty. My mil friends said I was "lucky."
She brings up some good points that I don't think are mentioned enough. For example, the military’s unwillingness to acknowledge and more accurately define domestic violence is behind the public curve. Houppert states the DV rates are “2-5 times higher than among civilians depending on which study is consulted” and that the military defines domestic violence as limited to actions against a current legal spouse, rather than how we all know it - betwen any domestic partners.
Houppert quotes extensively from Nancy Shea’s, “The Army Wife,” which scared the hell out of me. I can’t believe this “guidebook” was THE book on how to be a good army wife. The military may have been the first desegregated place in America (according to Colin Powell) but it is the final frontier for feminism in a lot of ways - at least for the spouses.
Overall I thought it was a good book because it balances out the other military life literature that is out there. I say give it a read.
She brings up some good points that I don't think are mentioned enough. For example, the military’s unwillingness to acknowledge and more accurately define domestic violence is behind the public curve. Houppert states the DV rates are “2-5 times higher than among civilians depending on which study is consulted” and that the military defines domestic violence as limited to actions against a current legal spouse, rather than how we all know it - betwen any domestic partners.
Houppert quotes extensively from Nancy Shea’s, “The Army Wife,” which scared the hell out of me. I can’t believe this “guidebook” was THE book on how to be a good army wife. The military may have been the first desegregated place in America (according to Colin Powell) but it is the final frontier for feminism in a lot of ways - at least for the spouses.
Overall I thought it was a good book because it balances out the other military life literature that is out there. I say give it a read.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Stuck! Stuck! Stuck!
I'm going to tell you a little secret. I've been asked to write a book about surviving deployment. No big publisher, just a start up, and truthfully I don't think it will get anywhere far, but I can't say yes, and I can't say no. They say you should do the thing that terrifies you, well, this terrifies me. The time, the committment, I just don't know if I'm up for it. I basically feel like a failure right now, so that doesn't help. I dropped my marathon training, I haven't published anything in over a month, and my 30th birthday is around the corner. I just want to feel that energy I felt when I was in college. (Hey, it wasn't THAT long ago.) I could make my mind possess my legs to get out of bed as early as I needed to, to run or study or whatever, and honey, I ain't got it anymore. Sigh. So, I spend most of my days working, researching, writing drafts that never get off my desktop and wondering what will finally light the fire beneath me. Is this just a phase that everyone goes through because I'm a)turning 30 b) still getting back to normal after a deployment or c)always like this, life just never slowed down enough for me to see it?
Thursday, September 13, 2007
You know, just because I don't take the time to write anything cool doesn't mean I'm gone :) In fact, I've written three posts that never made it to "live." I thought it would help to tell you about what my days are like.
Gabe started soccer and is in the middle of TKD tournaments. He ROCKS at sparring. Seriously he is amazing. He was MVP for the meet last time. But soccer is another story. We went to his first practice and he was on the verge of tears. "I feel like I'm the worst player," he sniffed. But he didn't want to quit, so I was really proud of him. He is focusing on having fun at the games, but I have to admit that I am nervous for him. The other boys really are good and I just don't want him to feel badly about himself. So, those activities take about 4-5 nights a week.
Then, I have my freelance writing gig. I'm writing monthly for a magazine that some of you mil spouses are familiar with I hope! It's pretty exciting and I'm learning about a lot of other mil spouses who write as well (and get paid!). That, in addition to working, takes most of my time.
Weekends have proven to be rarely relaxing, but always fun. Last weekend we went to a wine tasting at a friends' house where we got into, what else, politics and the war. Me, my husband and a surprisingly articulate 24 year old kid monopolized the conversation, which I normally don't do because I hate talking about politics when I'm trying to have fun and forget. But this time I found myself drawn in. I didn't realize how much I know about the war until my husband turned to me surprised and was like, you're really getting into this! I wasn't "into it" I just can't hold my tongue. So, anyway, it's night with friends, then church, then household chores. This Saturday Gabe has TKD tourney at 1, soccer at 3, then I'm off to a party at 7.
Meanwhile Terry is back at school, pursuing an LLM, working and delusional to think he is going to run the MCM. Fridays roll around like pennies in those funnels you see in the mall. I'm probably the only person who enjoys Mondays. That's when I don't work and Asher and I get to spend some real quality time together.
I hope you are all well, I check all your blogs often :). I will eventually go private, so if you want to have permission to read please write me.
Gabe started soccer and is in the middle of TKD tournaments. He ROCKS at sparring. Seriously he is amazing. He was MVP for the meet last time. But soccer is another story. We went to his first practice and he was on the verge of tears. "I feel like I'm the worst player," he sniffed. But he didn't want to quit, so I was really proud of him. He is focusing on having fun at the games, but I have to admit that I am nervous for him. The other boys really are good and I just don't want him to feel badly about himself. So, those activities take about 4-5 nights a week.
Then, I have my freelance writing gig. I'm writing monthly for a magazine that some of you mil spouses are familiar with I hope! It's pretty exciting and I'm learning about a lot of other mil spouses who write as well (and get paid!). That, in addition to working, takes most of my time.
Weekends have proven to be rarely relaxing, but always fun. Last weekend we went to a wine tasting at a friends' house where we got into, what else, politics and the war. Me, my husband and a surprisingly articulate 24 year old kid monopolized the conversation, which I normally don't do because I hate talking about politics when I'm trying to have fun and forget. But this time I found myself drawn in. I didn't realize how much I know about the war until my husband turned to me surprised and was like, you're really getting into this! I wasn't "into it" I just can't hold my tongue. So, anyway, it's night with friends, then church, then household chores. This Saturday Gabe has TKD tourney at 1, soccer at 3, then I'm off to a party at 7.
Meanwhile Terry is back at school, pursuing an LLM, working and delusional to think he is going to run the MCM. Fridays roll around like pennies in those funnels you see in the mall. I'm probably the only person who enjoys Mondays. That's when I don't work and Asher and I get to spend some real quality time together.
I hope you are all well, I check all your blogs often :). I will eventually go private, so if you want to have permission to read please write me.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Feeling Blue
So many thoughts have been tumbling through my brain with the tags "blog this" on them, but I just haven't taken the time to do it. I am really thinking about going underground. Meaning, I don't want anyone who knows the "real life" Monique to read this anymore. It's not that I have anything to hide, it's more to protect those that I love because I am very suspicious about who is reading my blog and because I want to write more freely - Terry doesn't want our stuff out there for our family and friends to read. Ok? :) Which I totally understand. So, if you want to be privy to word hell, I mean, well, send me an email word well 7 at yahoo dot com and I will approve you to read. (If no one emails me, I will be further depressed. Read on.)
Anyway, I've been dealing with a truly tipsy boss, sudden onset of insecurity and self-loathing for not being able to do anything I commit to: Running, cleaning my house, stop raiding candy stores, going to bed before midnight. It's like I'm fighting with my inner 4 year old. "I don't wanna take Gabe to Tae Kwon Do, I wanna sit here and pout. Hmph." Seriously I have issues. I am hoping this is only because I'm turning 30 in a couple of months and I haven't met my two goals to write a book and run a marathon. Simple right? Not real creative, but they were mine and they meant something to me. And I feel I've let myself down you know?
That's tough to feel when I (barely) held it together from 05-06, but I did it. My children didn't get taken by social services, I sought help when I needed it and refused anti-depressants when they were encouraged. Soldiers come back to awards and ribbons and praise, and I think sometimes spouses feel like their behind the scenes work is wiped clean when the spouse comes home. I feel that way sometimes. For those of you mommas, it's also like when the baby is born and all that focus on you and your health and your "glow" shifts to the baby. And you're spread eagle on the table, sweaty, fat, and like, "Um, I helped?" Ha ha.
Anyway, I've been dealing with a truly tipsy boss, sudden onset of insecurity and self-loathing for not being able to do anything I commit to: Running, cleaning my house, stop raiding candy stores, going to bed before midnight. It's like I'm fighting with my inner 4 year old. "I don't wanna take Gabe to Tae Kwon Do, I wanna sit here and pout. Hmph." Seriously I have issues. I am hoping this is only because I'm turning 30 in a couple of months and I haven't met my two goals to write a book and run a marathon. Simple right? Not real creative, but they were mine and they meant something to me. And I feel I've let myself down you know?
That's tough to feel when I (barely) held it together from 05-06, but I did it. My children didn't get taken by social services, I sought help when I needed it and refused anti-depressants when they were encouraged. Soldiers come back to awards and ribbons and praise, and I think sometimes spouses feel like their behind the scenes work is wiped clean when the spouse comes home. I feel that way sometimes. For those of you mommas, it's also like when the baby is born and all that focus on you and your health and your "glow" shifts to the baby. And you're spread eagle on the table, sweaty, fat, and like, "Um, I helped?" Ha ha.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
One year home.
I forgot to remind you all. Ter's been home for ONE year!!! He landed at his demob site on July 29, 2006, but didn't get HOME, home, until a few days later. Can you freaking believe it? Don't believe the hype about the one year mark. Things are tough around here. Everything, the emotions, the nightmares, are just beneath the surface, thinly veiled by normal, suburban life. I realized that I think I fight with the old Terry, because the new Terry has a lot to deal with. That was a breakthrough. I'm the one who doesn't want to face the reality of what that year did to him, and to us. We are strong in a lot of ways, but trust me when I say his tour was not like most. All those guys where he was in Fallujah had a rough, rough tour, and I'm just so glad they're home. Well, all but two. And for those two, I'll never forget their survivors. I try to keep life in perspective and not get bogged down by trivial things, or even things not so trivial, but just not important enough to sweat over. Like the fact that I do not like my boss. Or that our car is breaking down and we can't really afford to buy a new one since we just bought a house. Or that I really miss my mom who will not travel because of her seizures. I mean, that stuff sucks, but she's alive right? I'm alive, my kids are healthy, I could be living with a lot worse you know?
The hottie on the far right is my little sis :)
For now celebrate with me, the anniversary of this one making it home.
And look us now..
Good news?
How is it possible that the news media had a positive headline about the casualties in Iraq. Apparently deaths are at an 8 month low. But that number still represents over 70 of our bravest lost their lives in Iraq this month. Still, I'm glad to see the news has found a way to show the work getting done there is getting us somewhere in the realm of winning!
Let the lovers and haters commence with the comments...
Let the lovers and haters commence with the comments...
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Green
I hate to admit it, but all the green press has made me rethink my environmental attitude a little bit. At the commissary, I got paper instead of plastic. I used to dismiss their requests to use paper with a wave of my hand. "When you start making paper bags with handles, I'll start using them," I would say. It's really hard to carry 20 bags of groceries two at a time, up 10 stairs. But, I decided I would suck it up a little and do my part for the environment. I also decided to start turning off my computer at work, and I'm trying to at home. I set my thermometer in my house to 76 degrees.I switch off lights around my house, and we sold our big gas guzzler. I have my eyes set on a 2007 Camry hybrid.
I think what really got my attention was Live Earth. Now, I didn't actually watch any performances, I was just intrigued by all the hype, and because it had no real goal to accomplish but to tell all of us minions to conserve. I think they're all a bunch of hypocrites. But, I do think we are responsible for the earth, we DO waste far too much. Will it make a difference? I don't know. I think of it as little acts of kindness that I would do for a person, only I'm doing it for the sake of my children's future environment. I guess I'm an idealist in that I believe if we ALL did our part, we could make a difference. I don't know if I believe in all the DiCaprio/Gore doomsdayers though.
I think what really got my attention was Live Earth. Now, I didn't actually watch any performances, I was just intrigued by all the hype, and because it had no real goal to accomplish but to tell all of us minions to conserve. I think they're all a bunch of hypocrites. But, I do think we are responsible for the earth, we DO waste far too much. Will it make a difference? I don't know. I think of it as little acts of kindness that I would do for a person, only I'm doing it for the sake of my children's future environment. I guess I'm an idealist in that I believe if we ALL did our part, we could make a difference. I don't know if I believe in all the DiCaprio/Gore doomsdayers though.
Friday, July 06, 2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
